5 Lessons Rock Climbing Taught Me About Success
And overcoming the idea that I have to do it all myself
Many years ago, I was invited to spend a week at Miraval Resort in Arizona with a friend. Knowing what a treat that was, I, of course, agreed.
My friend Dianne wanted to take a rock climbing class at the wall they had there. I told her I’d be happy to cheer her on, but I did not want to do it myself. I’m afraid of heights, and the thought of going up that wall with only a line between me and a fall did not thrill me.
The rock climbing coach was wonderful. She explained everything, and soon Dianne strapped into the harness. Dianne made her way up carefully until she reached the top about 25 minutes later. I noticed how she planned where she would place her foot and hands thoughtfully. The coach belayed her, and once she reached the top, I cheered for her. She then easily rappelled down to the ground.
“Your turn,” she said. Despite my many protestations, she and the coach convinced me to try it. I strapped into the harness, listening again to the instructions.
Then, I faced THE WALL.
My mind works in strange ways. It’s not a linear process for me. I see the world in themes and patterns, and that allows me to distill and synthesize what could seem disparate pieces of information quickly.
As I gazed at the wall, I could see the pattern of footholds I could follow to reach the top in the most expedient way.
I began climbing, and five minutes later, I was almost at the top.
Until the coach yelled, “Stop!”
Hanging onto the wall, I looked down to see her and Dianne looking up at me with surprise.
The coach simply asked, “Is that the way you do everything?”
Confused, I asked her, “What do you mean?”
“Well, you’re almost all the way up, and you haven’t really enjoyed the climb. You just have your head in the wall and haven’t even looked around. Why don’t you pause here and look around?”
So I did.
And I saw the beautiful reds and oranges of the desert illuminated by a sun crawling halfway down the sky.
I could see the mountains in the distance, peaks slightly shrouded in the desert heat that floated from the ground.
She continued, “Are you aware that you are using your arms to pull yourself up when your legs are stronger?”
I hadn’t noticed that, but I could feel the strain in my arms once she mentioned it.
“Keep going to the top, but this time, use your legs and look around. You’ll enjoy it more.”
For the rest of the climb, I concentrated on using my legs to pull me up and my arms simply to direct my climb.
I slowed down and paused, looking around and into the distance.
Once I reached the top, I stopped and took in the view.
The desert lay in front of me with all its vibrancy and beauty. I simply breathed it in.
Then, I was ready for the descent, so I started climbing down.
“Stop!”, the coach called out. “I want you to let go of the wall.”
“Excuse me?”
“Let go of the wall. I’ve got you. Just let go and sit back and enjoy the view.”
No part of me wanted to let go of that wall. All kinds of images of me crashing to the ground ran through my mind.
“Go ahead. Let go of the wall. I’ve got you. I won’t let you fall.”
Dianne was right there cheering me on and encouraging me as well.
I closed my eyes, grabbed the line, and let go of the wall. I hung in mid-air, bouncing around a bit…but I didn’t fall.
The stunning view was my reward when I opened my eyes.
“Now, rappel down the wall and try to enjoy the freedom of letting someone else hold you as you come down.”
And I did. It was great fun rappelling down, reminding me of many adventures I had as a child when I had no fear.
Once down, we debriefed.
WHAT I LEARNED — 5 Lessons
That day I walked away with 5 lessons that I’ve applied intentionally to my life and business. Lessons I had to learn on a rock wall, embodying the fear and courage, and freedom that came from that climb.
1. Be present to everything — challenges and process. There’s no reason to fly to the next activity or goal. By paying attention to the process in real time, I learned to relax and not judge myself. Instead, I lost my fear and gained freedom.
2. Always use or play to your strength, even if it’s not convenient. I had expended too much energy using my arms when my strength was in my legs. Now when I take on a challenge, I do it in a way that leverages my strengths (intuition, communication, ability to see patterns) instead of my weaknesses (math, linear thinking, details).
3. Allow others to support you, provide honest feedback, and contribute to your success. The coach was there, belaying and keeping me safe, reflecting on my process so that I could learn and grow beyond my capabilities and reach my goal. Although I still struggle with asking for help, I’ve learned to do so when it meets a certain set of criteria. Collaborating with others who have strengths in areas I do not have has contributed to my success. Listening to trusted friends and colleagues when they give feedback has helped me improve in many areas of my life.
4. Pause and enjoy the view. I was so focused on achieving a goal that I took no time to celebrate the smaller victories along the way. How often do you only see what is missing, or still incomplete, and don’t acknowledge and celebrate what you have accomplished so far? By celebrating the smaller victories along the way and seeing the bigger picture that comes from noticing your achievements, you’ll learn and grow through every challenge you undertake.
5. Always have a cheerleader. When in doubt, turn to your colleague, friend, and cheerleader to support and encourage you. She will remind you that you CAN do what you set out to do even when you doubt it yourself.
To this day, Dianne is a good friend who I count on to share the experiences of my life. I am forever thankful for that invitation to Tucson so many years ago. Those lessons have been essential in designing the life I now lead courageously and joyfully.
