I’ve Been M.I.A.
And I’m not apologizing for it.
My life has been mirroring the change of seasons. As summer’s warm breezes and hot sun ease into the rainy days and cool nights of the fall, I, too, have made a few changes. Not until now, a few weeks away from the runaway train that has been my life since mid-September, am I resurfacing and renewing my energy.
Let’s Catch Up
On September 26, I moved from a small condo complex apartment to a lovely little cottage hidden down a rural road. It has a name: Casa do Jardim. The cottage is named the Garden House after the garden, filled with succulents, a few palm trees, olive trees, fig trees, and bushes that attract butterflies. The bonus is a private pool that mirrors the night sky, making me feel I am flying through the universe when I sit by it just as the stars appear.
I set up my bedroom and kitchen before I left for the United States on September 29 to deliver a leadership program in Tampa for women in the marine industry. I have been working with this group for two years and was thrilled to meet them in person. I confess I haven’t presented like this in years, but the moment I stood in front of the group, something inside just switched on, and I had a great time sharing what I’ve learned over the years about leadership and, in particular, women’s leadership.
Despite enjoying the few days with the group and my client and friend Michele, I returned thoroughly exhausted to a house full of unopened boxes and an unexpected addition to my family: Kludde the cat.
Kludde had been my neighbor’s cat, a stray she had begun to feed. He considered my neighbor his person. But she moved and could not take him with her. And I just couldn’t leave him to an insecure future.
Over the next few weeks, my cottage came together with the help of my dear friend Annika, an interior designer. I am now in love with this place. Perfect for the introvert in me and the writer who needs nature, beautiful spaces, and quiet to write.
Then, on October 19, I greeted the Unapologetic Retreat group, two co-facilitators, and three guests. The days were longer than I anticipated. It rained a lot. I could not walk the cliffs for more than ten minutes with Sophie. I did not write one word the entire time. I had very little solitude. In short, I did not have everything in my life that nourished me.
However, I consider the retreat a success. The guests left with more than we would’ve been able to give to a larger group. My co-facilitators enjoyed the Algarve in our free time (mostly evenings and the weekend after everyone departed). We discovered how to produce an even better retreat next year with some tweaks.
The first day I returned to the cliffs was October 31. How appropriate that this was Samhain, the festival that marks the transition of the season. I spent forty-five minutes drinking in the ocean air and feeling enveloped by the expansive sky. I arrived feeling like a well gone dry and returned home filled with gratitude.
Why M.I.A. is A.O.K
It’s taken me many days to replenish my energy, return to my self-care routine, and feel grounded again. During that time, I could hear my thoughts scolding me. “You missed your newsletter deadline. You didn’t send out the Substack post that is due. You haven’t written those essays sitting on your desktop half-started. You haven’t posted on social media.” And on and on.
At first, my body took on the tension of the chiding from my mind. But a louder voice prevailed. “It’s fine. All in time. Renew first so everything you produce is excellent, wholehearted, and aligned with your energy.”
There will be times when you will feel depleted, energetically, emotionally, mentally, or all of the above. Everyone goes through times when it’s all hands on deck. But those times are finite. They should not last months or years without some respite.
Once the intensity is over, give yourself permission to recover. Don’t re-enter your work as if nothing occurred. When you break a bone, it takes time to heal. When you exert yourself, it takes time to recover your energy. There should be no guilt or anxiety attached to that. Build that time in.
When I run my retreats, I block the four days following the retreat to recover. It’s very intentional. I know from experience it takes that time to renew myself. I schedule those days as if they were work because my job is recovery.
How to stay nourished when busy
Even though I was busy during the last thirty days, I found moments to reconnect and stay nourished. I could not go for a forty-five-minute walk on the cliffs, but I could stand at the ocean for ten minutes. I did not enjoy my hours of solitude as usual. Instead, I would find fifteen minutes in my car or the house to sit quietly and breathe deeply. You must be intentional about self-care, especially when life is crazy busy. Anyone can take fifteen minutes to be still or take a ten-minute walk outside. Self-care is as essential to your goals as it is to your health.
So, welcome back! I’ll be back on schedule with my writing, newsletter, and Substack posts. And if I need a break, I will take the time to replenish - unapologetically. I hope you do the same.
If you’re short on time and need to restore yourself, try one of my 59 Ways to Quiet Your Mind. Download the List Here.
Are you ready to take a “time in” so you can leap forward? If so, join me in Portugal for your personal, curated Becoming Limitless Experience. Get details HERE.
